Sad Goodbyes but New Revivals

After breakfast and coffee with my mom and sister this morning, a 45 minute snuggle time with Ainsley sleeping soundly on my chest and some relaxing, showering, and packing, I once again went to the airport which seems to occur quite often. I've done it so many times that it just seems like a normal part of my life going from airport to airport usually by myself with excited greetings or sad goodbyes. The excited times remind me of why I love to travel and the sad ones make me question my decisions in life and why I have chosen the path that I have chosen. Today was a sad time. It is always difficult to leave loved ones wondering when the next visit will be and wishing we were closer but knowing it just isn't in the cards right now. I sat in the Boise airport after my mom dropped me off and cried softly as I texted Jenny another goodbye and sweetly received a picture message of her and Ainsley saying "Miss you and love you!" I called Caro, soothed myself in silence and then it happened...I started reading the book Eat Pray Love for the second time and was opened up again to an exciting, vibrant revival of the self that I know. If I had some extreme connection to anyone in the world it would be with Elizabeth Gilbert. I now remember why I loved this book so much the first time I read it. So many things she says especially in the first part of the book touch on similar experiences I have had or feelings I have felt but wasn't sure anyone understood or felt to. It isn't a coincidence that we are both sensitive, emotional Cancers. I feel like I could write a similar book of my life but am still in the first couple chapters on the brink of the "meat" of the book. It's actually a little strange reading her thoughts at times cause it seems like such a reflection of myself. She had a heart to travel and experience pleasure, God and balance and I'm right there with her. I'm working on a way to do a similar voyage of food and travel and know it will happen one way or another. THAT is why I have chosen to live this way, THAT is why I do what I do, THAT is why I listen so strongly to my heart and THAT is what makes me me and not an imitation of someone else or a picture of convention. Maybe, just maybe, this part of my life will also be written as a book to comfort, inspire, and entertain others. You just wait!

As I landed in Denver for my 3 hour layover the flight attendent announced all the connecting flights. The one that stood out the most was a flight to Frankfurt. My mind instantly jumped to an image and idea of me spontaneously booking myself on that flight and just going for it. I had a big grin on my face and an excited feeling rush through my body as I shook my head knowing that I definitely had the guts to do it and it would be a great story but heard a voice in my head telling me to "have patience". I honestly wouldn't put something like this passed me. If not for a few restraints and obligations I probably would have done it. It was even harder to hold back when I randomly started talking to a woman on the Tram to the terminal that just so happened to be taking the Frankfurt flight cause she lived in Freiburg! ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I then had to think twice and really belt myself in the seat waiting to get on my Chicago flight. I called Caro to tell her my crazy thought and I course she didn't try to stop me :) I sat for another hour and then was lured to the screen to see when the Frankfurt flight left figuring it already had BUT no it was now delayed 3 hours, so you can image my mind wondering if that was some sort of sign. As I stood there for about 20 mins with the Chicago gate on my left and the Frankfurt gate toward the right I finally went right :) I even got as far as the standing there staring at the gate and then calling Luftansa to see if there was room (just for fun but they said I would have to ask the desk cause booking was closed over the phone) before I had to rush back to the gate and board the plane back to Chicago. Crazy girl I am! It was a fun thought though! Again, hearing "have patience, have patience" in my head. So close but I will be there soon. A piece of my heart is definitely still there and I will have another chapter there I'm sure but not yet.

Made it back home in Chicago at about 11:45. Time for bed and back to work tomorrow :)